Love And Life Toolbox
Self-Quiz: Signs of Problematic Relationship Patterns

Self-Quiz: Signs of Problematic Relationship Patterns

Topic Progress:

Read the following statements and reflect on whether they are True or False:


  • I carry an underlying sense of not being good enough.


  • I have a strong need for independence in relationships.


  • I can be very dependent in relationships.


  • It’s hard for me to say how I really feel in relationships.


  • I struggle to trust in relationships.


  • I fear that people will abandon me.


  • I seem to be attracted to chaotic relationships.


  • I have been abused in relationships; physically or emotionally.


  • I often seek partners who are wounded and try to save them.


  • Substance abuse has been a theme in my relationships.


A “Yes” to any of the above are possible indicators that you engage in problematic relationship patters.  Consider the following:

Are there possible reasons you are susceptible to repeating these patterns?

Did you witness similar patterns from your parents, primary caregivers?


Note in your journal what is relevant to you.

Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT

Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT

Lisa Brookes Kift, MFT is the creator of with emotional and relationship health articles, guides, courses and other tools for individuals and couples. She is a frequent consultant for the media having appeared in,, and others. Lisa has a private practice in Marin County, CA and offers Emotional Health and Relationship Consultations via email, phone or video conference.